Sun, sea and overthinking
Finding myself again one step at a time
I’m pretty sure the philosopher Kierkegaard was also on a solo holiday when he wrote that “anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.” 😂
On the first full day of my solo trip to Albufeira, Portugal I had no plan, nothing that needed to be achieved and no one I needed to please. I couldn’t remember ever being so responsibility-less and the freedom was both wonderful and overwhelming.
I walked to the beach which was 5 minutes away from the hostel and when I reached the seafront I decided to turn left and keep walking.
The sun was shining, the waves were lapping at my feet and there was a slight sea breeze which was very welcome in the 30-degree heat. I listened to an audiobook, people watched and walked and it was bliss.
After a while I realised at some point I would need to stop walking and could sit on the beach. When should that be I wondered? And how long should I sit on the beach before I should start walking again?
These were simple and inconsequential decisions so why on Earth was I overthinking them and struggling to make them?!
I realised that my natural tendency when I’m with others is to go with the flow. More often than not I don’t have a strong preference and if that’s the…
